8/24/2020 By Larry Barker
All of us are familiar with the thinking that the grass always seems greener on the other side of the fence or in another church. Years ago I heard it said that it might be greener but it is just as tough to mow. So the question must be asked, “Is the grass greener at another church or ministry?” Some have moved fields to find out they got out of the skillet and jumped into the fire. Looks can be deceiving but we cannot deny the truth that the grass can be greener in another church or a different ministry. Should we stay or should we look for greener grass?
Hang on for a minute before you think I am saying you should move on and go for the bigger church or the better opportunity. However, you should be honest about what you see and know to be true. While listening to a podcast it was a privilege to hear Shauna Pilgreen (author of Love Where You Live) shed some light on this reality. She shared that her and her husband moved to San Francisco nine years ago to plant Epic Church. She said it is easy to be jealous whenever they visit a church where there are plenty of parking spaces for all who attend.
All of us live in and serve in our places of ministry with different shades of green. There will be seasons we go through that are very dry spells where the grass looks brown and dead. Shauna challenges us to first celebrate where God has placed you. The greener grass syndrome is accentuated when it comes from a place of discontentment and a lack of gratitude. There will always be bigger congregations, budgets, and staffs. There will always be churches with more parking, more workers, more unity, and a better opportunity.
Shauna goes on to say that we are asking the wrong question when we want to know if the grass is greener. The better question is, “Am I on the right grass?” The lie of the devil is that we are on the wrong grass and if we got on the right grass then everything would be better. We begin to believe that we would be happier on the greener grass we are envious of and that we would be more “successful”. You never know how long God will keep you on the grass you are on so do not waste any time dreaming of greener grass. Stay in your lane and love your people.
She then asks two very important questions. First, “Why are you wanting to go?” Are you being led away to something else or are you running from where you are? Chances are that if you are trying to get away you may not have the right motives or seeing your present situation clearly. Second, “Is God the one sending you?” God has been blamed many times for decisions He never made and directions He never gave. Slow down and make sure you have prayed and fasted through a decision that will impact your family and most likely two churches.
In a recent pastor Zoom meeting we had two pastors who have pastored the same church 49 years and the other 45 years. When asked what had helped them to remain at the same church that amount of time one shared that it was because of three people in his life that he could always lean on. First, he said he could always discuss this with his wife. How blessed we are to have ministry partners in our spouses who pray and labor with us about God’s direction. Make sure you are seeking Him together and listening to one another as well.
The second person was an older pastor in his life who he could call and be mentored by him. There is wisdom in counsel and the book of Proverbs is clear that we should seek the counsel of others. Mark Batterson has stressed the importance of proper rest during a time like this by saying, “A change of place with a change of pace brings a change of perspective.” Make sure you have a circle of friends in your life that will give you scriptural and spiritual advice when the grass seems to be burnt and dead. Advice is cheap but spiritual advice is priceless.
The third person he said helped him during the difficult times and made it possible to serve so many years in the same church was a godly deacon he could talk with. When I was planting a church in northern Illinois I was blessed to have such a man who was always available to listen without judging and unconditionally care about me. Many times he would pull up to my house in his pickup and we would go get a cup of coffee where he would invariably say, “Consider the source!” These men are priceless because they encourage you by pouring courage into you.
Do not fall prey to the temptation of the comparison trap. Be faithful to where God has placed you and called you. Shauna Pilgreen says it this way, “Doing what you are created to do, in your season of life, in the place you live.” Make sure you are willing to go wherever He calls you but, just as important, be willing to stay right where He put you on the grass where He placed you no matter what shade of green it might be!